A Well-Oiled Bicycle

Showers.
Lovers.
Tea in the snow.

A well-boiled icicle.

First, you come.
Then, you go.

Hot or cold?

Just a well-oiled bicycle.
Better for the letters
Switching
Temperatures

But, beware of burning frostbite and frozen pedals.
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It was Bjorn who brought up spoonerisms at the second Friday-night house party.
At the first party, girls in bathing suits and summer dresses borrowed my sweatshirt.
Cold. Clear.
A night for the stars.
A sight for the...friend traveling from the Southern Hemisphere.

Kniferisms.
Forkerisms.
Sporkerisms at Taco Bell.

Old schisms.
New Popes.
Well, one Argentine.
Like the friendly traveler.
Hola Natalia Casella
Hail Pope Francis
And thank you, Reverend William Archibald Spooner.

Of all the examples, "A well-boiled icicle" burned cold in my memory while Bjorn and the others planned a morning bike ride and told me to buy a mountain bike.
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"You say black, I say white
You say bark, I say bite
You say shark, I say hey man
Jaws was never my scene
And I don't like Star Wars
You say Rolls, I say Royce
You say God, give me a choice
You say Lord, I say Christ
I don't believe in Peter Pan
Frankenstein or Superman
All I wanna do is

Bicycle bicycle bicycle
I want to ride my bicycle bicycle bicycle
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride my bike
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride my 

Bicycle races are coming your way
So forget all your duties oh yeah!
Fat bottomed girls they'll be riding today
So look out for those beauties oh yeah
On your marks get set go
Bicycle race bicycle race bicycle race
Bicycle bicycle bicycle

I want to ride my bicycle
Bicycle bicycle bicycle
Bicycle race" 

"Bicycle Race" by Freddie Mercury

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The day of my Grandpa's memorial, Mom and Dad and I thought the rest of the family would attend church.

But they didn't.

And we did. 

It was the middle of the Wisconsin winter. My cousins' children played on their grandparents' laps.

And I listened to an interpretation of scripture that I had never heard before.

"You say God, give me a choice," sings Freddie.

In the vision depicted in the last book of the Bible, Jesus Christ observes seven churches. Each has a different mix of success and deficiency in following his example and teachings. 

"To...the church at Laodicea...I know all the things you do," read the speaker from Revelation 3:15, "that you are neither hot nor cold. I wish that you were one or the other!"

Every preacher I've ever heard speak about the assessment of the lukewarm Laodicean church has made a significant assumption about Jesus's wish that those Christian Turks would be either hot or cold.

Hot is better than cold.

Is it? 

The speaker that day said no.

Heat disinfects, but cold preserves. 

Ice breaks stones and turns rock into soil where green goodness can grow.

"We need hot and cold Christians," he said. "Sometimes we need to be hot, other times cold depending on the season and the need."

In a time when men did not respect women and Jews did not speak to Samaritans, Jesus, the Jewish Rabbi from Nazareth in the boondocks of Galilee, said this to a Samaritan woman at a well:

"...whoever drinks the water that I give them will never thirst again." (John 4:14) 

Tea?

Ice-water?

A well-boiled icicle?

____________________________________

The first time I heard the well-oiled-bicycle spoonerism, I thought of two people I've known for a long time.

My classmate Evan races bicycles on mountains and across country.

He negotiates and buys parts directly from manufacturers in China.

Athlete. Entrepreneur. 

Pumping, gaining elevation. 

Sliding. Thirty miles an hour. Downhill. Controlled rolling, falling.

Sometimes no control. Crash.

Going pro. "Becoming awesome," says Emily.

My coworker Craig liked to tell people that he was once a male stripper...when he owned a house repainting business.

He loved his terraced garden and Koi pond.

He took vacation to spend time with his wife when she had to travel for work.

He had lunch with his kids every week.

He crashed his well-oiled bicycle on the way to the office one morning last November.

Now he has a chair with four wheels.

____________________________________

I see teapots full of icicles and frozen bicycles.

It's a hot-cold day with a hazelnut latte in my hand.

Well, what's leftover after pouring some of it down my shirt. Hot!

Asi es la vida.

Bicycle races are coming your way...